Juggling balls

You know that feeling where you're juggling many balls in the air and you feel like you're in the zone and you've got this, then one ball drops, then the next one and before you know it you can't keep a ball in the air? You're not alone. 

I felt like I had everything under control, then I suddenly realised that balls are dropping. And while this isn't the worst thing in the world, it does make me start to feel like I'm failing and letting people down. Once I drop one ball they all start to drop. 

I'm one of those annoying people that says yes, yes, yes to things when I'm feeling good and in the 'flow', and when that 'flow' moves on everything comes to a screeching halt. 

I've been head down bum up organising stuff for a new social enterprise some friends and I have created, and as soon as I ticked the box and sent our funding request off I feel like I've mentally checked out. 

Similarly for Kamala, I've broken the routine of organising an event every month with no March and April events, and that has thrown me out of whack and I'm finding that other activities like blogging and posting to social media aren't coming easy. 

I also feel guilty at the moment when I do take time out to just chill, as I haven't had a chance to catch up with some of my friends for a while, and these connections are really important to me. 

So you aren't alone, and I'm sure I'm not either and it's ok. We all do the best we can in the moment. 

Blessings x


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