An old friend used to give me shit for my love of routine. She thought it was crazy that every Saturday morning I would do my groceries and come home to do my housework. For her these things would happen organically as they needed to.
I often felt shamed for how attached to these routines I was. It was like I was too rigid, not fun or spontaneous, too controlling.
And of course knowing what I know now and looking back I was using routine to give me a sense of control. I think that I've always had this trait, and have no idea why. But I've come to accept it, but I'm also mindful not to allow it to become too dominant and get stuck in a rut.
When it comes down to it, we all create our own ways of coping through life, the good and the bad times.
- I can't have an untidy house - I still like to clean my house at the start of the weekend so it's done, whether this is a Friday night or Saturday morning.
- I have to make my bed every morning.
- I like to make my breakfast at night so it's ready for me to take to work the next day.
- I need to have the volume on an even number.
- I have to have a clean kitchen with the dishes washes and bench wiped down.
- I have to brush my teeth when I have a shower.
- I have my alarm set for 6:10am and another one for 6:30am, even though I never get up that early.
These are some of the bizarre things that make me me. They allow me to feel in control and this helps with my wellbeing.